journal

maybe when someone that you love away from you, and then they came back,do you feel happy about that? of course you are! because it’s the time you waiting for them to come home. but not me. I'm not excited and interested about that. maybe there’s something happen. maybe earlier i would be happy about the returning, but not in the past 2 days.

sometimes when you feel alone you will thinking a lot. i had it too. there’s a lot in my mind. everything's made me sad. and yes, I'm thinking one is better than two. there’s 2 days, I'm not smiling, talk when i think it’s needed and more being along in my room with the light off. my eye’s hurts a lot. my heart hurts a lot. yes, I'm not ok. but, what’s the point to tell and yet the same thing happen over and over again? maybe  i need to shut my mouth. let me be hurt alone.

it is the day. i need to smile even I'm not ready to meet anyone or talk to anyone. but i have to, just to make others happy even my heart crying (only god knows how many tears drop) i need to smile. i need to make myself look happier, it just I'm not sure if i can do that. I'm not good at acting. I'm sorry if i can’t be such a good actress.